The great philosopher Mike Tyson once said, “Everybody has a plan…until they get punched in the mouth.”
And, of course, that definitely applies to going on a date with an insanely attractive woman that we really like.
Here’s the thing: There are lots of things you can do correctly on a date to be more attractive to a woman (and a ridiculous amount of things you can do to screw things up haha)…
However, no matter how much we know about how to do well on a date, most of us fall back to our instincts and the behaviors we’ve already done lots of times before when we get nervous, when things don’t go exactly as we planned, or when we meet up with a woman and she’s even more good-looking and awesome than we remember.
And that means we need a BASIC plan that we can ALWAYS stick to that allows us to be successful even when we get nervous and forget all the million little things that can help us.
It’s the 80/20 rule applied to dating:
Yes, there are tons of different things that make you successful and it helps you to learn as many as you can, but 80% of your results with women come from 20% of your behaviors.
So, in this article, we’ll cover 3 simple keys that you can (should) ALWAYS follow to be more successful on a date with a woman.
These are the basic FUNDAMENTALS of what makes you attractive on a date.
And fundamentals are always at the core of even the highest levels of success…
And, again, these fundamental keys are the most critical things in terms of a woman becoming MORE attracted to you after a date instead of losing attraction.
The best part about these fundamental keys: You should be able to follow them no matter how nervous you get.
In fact, they should help you feel less nervous on a date.
So, from now on, follow these 3 simple keys every single time you go out with a woman no matter what and then just keep improving and calibrating your skills as you continue to gain experience.
Because, if you do, the success you seek will come:
3 Simple Keys to a PERFECT Date…
Key #1: Keep your date LIGHT and PLAYFUL…
Another great American sage, Cyndi Lauper, said it best:
“Girls just want to have fun.”
YES.
Let the fun you’re having with her BE your connection with her (at least during the first 2-3 months of dating).
Don’t talk about serious, heavy subjects…
Avoid topics like politics, religion, and sex…
Don’t tell her all about your problems and personal issues…
Don’t make your date into a therapy appointment…
Don’t try to connect with her in some kind of “DEEP” conversation (she has plenty of friend zone guys for that)…
You can state your opinion about whatever you want and you can disagree with her without being disagreeable, but don’t argue with her and definitely don’t try to convince her that she’s wrong about something using a long, boring, logical argument…
Playfully tease her and get some jokes in if you can…
Keep in mind that playful teasing gives her an out:
YOU: “You’re not a stalker are you…I’m kinda picking up on a little bit of a stalker vibe from you” 😉
HER: “NO! I’m not like that at all…I promise!”
YOU: “Okay, cool haha. I was worried for a sec but now I’m good.” =)
When she defends herself a little bit, validate her instead of continuing to tease her.
Put-downs are different (and they are NOT light and playful):
“Your nose is ugly…” etc.
That’s just hurtful and gives her no opportunity to defend herself or play back.
Not cool at all.
So, tease her often; just never put her down.
And lay off the compliments (limit yourself to ONE compliment per date).
Have as much FUN with her as you possibly can.
Let your “connection” with her take care of itself (if she has a great time with you it WILL).
Remember: Keep your dates light, playful, and FUN.
Key #2: Let HER Talk…
Find a way to get her talking about something she’s passionate about or HERSELF and then LET HER TALK…
She should be talking 60-80% of the time on your date while you just share back related things from your life once in a while and then throw her another open-ended question and keep letting her talk.
You can combine key #1 and key #2 to great effect…
For example, ask her an open-ended question that’s light and fun, like this one:
“If you could be any animal, what would you be and why?”
Then, tease her about her answer…
HER: “I’d be a bird so I could fly…”
YOU: “A bird? Really? Hmmm…that’s really original. Oh, and I thought for sure you’d pick giraffe because you’re so tall…” <==Use this if she’s really short.
Then, fire off another open-ended, fun question:
“Okay Aurora, if you hit the lottery jackpot tomorrow and never had to work again, what would you do then and why?”
Then, encourage her to go deeper into her answer:
“Oh, really? What got you interested in X?”
Etc.
Instead of trying to tell her everything about yourself like most guys do, do whatever you can to get HER talking and then let her talk as much as possible.
I can’t even tell you how important this is…
Remember: Close your mouth and let her talk.
Key #3: Let go of all OUTCOMES…
This is the biggest key that can almost instantly skyrocket your success with women.
If you do EXACTLY the same things you do now, except that when you’re on a date with a woman you don’t worry about whether you’ll kiss her or not, whether or not she’ll sleep with you, and/or whether or not she will want to be in a relationship with you, you’ll do 100X better.
So, stay PRESENT with her as much as possible…
Because the less you worry about these things, the more they actually happen.
Now, of course, you still have to LEAD.
So, you still have to ask for a woman’s number…
You still have to decide what day and time to ask her to meet up with you…
You still have to plan the dates and you still have to figure something out when something doesn’t go to plan on the date…
And you still have to GO for a kiss by the end of your second date with her.
You just don’t think about the kiss and worry about whether or not it will happen for the whole date.
And you don’t worry about the relationship status side of things AT ALL – that’s her turf and only she knows when the time is right for that next level and she’ll definitely let you know when she’s ready for it (it’s when her interest in you reaches 9/10 because she’s been having so much fun with you, she’s been talking so much on your dates that you’ve been taking her on once every 7-10 days or so for a couple months, and you haven’t been pressing her about being together AT ALL).
You just keep asking her to go out and having FUN with her, waiting 4-8 days after each date and then asking her out again, and repeating that cycle until she asks you where the relationship is headed.
THEN you can ask her to be your girlfriend if you want.
Now, you CAN worry about where your relationship is headed with her or think about how you’ll set things up to go for a kiss when you’re not with her if you want…
Just don’t do it when she’s there with you.
Plan EVERYTHING before the date – including backup locations in case the place you take her is closed, etc.
Do all the “work” beforehand.
Then, on the date, be present and let it FLOW.
Also, don’t analyze how you’re doing on the date until AFTER the date is over and you’re home by yourself.
Think of it like a swan gliding smoothly over a placid lake: He looks smooth moving across the water, but what you don’t see is that he’s paddling like crazy under the water.
Remember: Forget about any outcomes you might be seeking, be present with her, and let the things you want come to you.
So, to recap, EVERY time you go out on a date with a woman, whenever you forget all the million things you’re supposed to do, just:
1. Keep it light, playful, and FUN (no serious, heavy, deep subjects!)…
2. Get her talking and then LET HER TALK…
3. Let go of all outcomes.
Again, there are LOTS of other things you can do to be more attractive to a woman on a date, but these are the 3 things that can give you the biggest boost…
When you follow them, she KNOWS you’re the kind of guy she wants.
And you can implement them starting RIGHT NOW.
So remember these 3 critical fundamentals, follow them ALL THE TIME, and then build from there.
Until Next Time,
Jim
Advanced Free Training:
Attract Women Without Words – Brad Pitt’s Body Language Secrets
How to Attract a Devoted Girlfriend or Wife – The Formula
How to Get Her Number and Text Her – Free E-Book
